Because the internet is a glorious place, a Reddit thread explored the myth of the Starbucks that is only open for 30 minutes. Could it be true? Who knows. Certainly, the store signage says so — and it seems real (but who knows? It’s most likely a typo). More importantly, we have the hilarious comments that people left, which we will explore in detail because humans are ridiculous— and coincidentally, we’re on a coffee break.
If you look super closely at the image, you’ll see the reflection of a man in the background, which prompted user Advorange to ask: “Who’s the guy staring at you?” It’s a pretty good question, since he seems like a The Matrix-esque agent.
Some of the Reddit users’ guesses included Michael Scott (lol), Ted Cruz, Jimmy Fallon, and Mr. Bean. Interesting.
Another user, Toemoss66, wrote, “The time traveler is their best customer. He’s the only one who can make those hours work.” A smart theory, we think.
Another user, Zugwat, explained that some Starbucks may just be open during their busiest hours: “That’s how early my local Starbucks opens… but this one could be for people who get off work and immediately need a pick-me-up within a specific time range…”
Then there was another pretty smart idea, offered by Odds-Bodkins: “I think it must be a little stand or kiosk or something near a bigger Starbucks, and they send someone round to man it during the commuter rush or something.”
After this point, the Reddit thread devolves pretty quickly into pornographic jokes — which we’ll skip over here — but we have to say, it’s worth a read.
It just doesn’t make sense to keep a place open for 30 minutes a day. But you know what does make sense? Every drink at Starbucks. We think they’re all delish, especially the secret menu ones:
What’s this? Does Starbuck do bubble drinks?! Tell us where.
These magical creations look pretty good. They’re not on every menu. Maybe only certain special Starbucks — like the ones that stay open for only 30 minutes each day — serve them?
Good to know, Starbucks. We’ll see you there for the pink drinks.
This guy knows what’s up. Even pups like a good ol’ Starbucks.
We can’t stop finding this pink drink alluring. Now we know what’s in it: “A mango dragonfruit refresher with coconut milk.”
Pink hot chocolate?! Yes, please.
And more puppies. BECAUSE WHY NOT?
What’s this magical thing? It was the Witches Brew:
What’s your favorite ‘bucks drink?
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