21 Things We Weirdly Wanted To Eat As Kids, Even Though We Definitely Shouldn’t Have

I feel so #blessed that I grew up in the ’90s, a decade when my velcro sneakers lit up when I walked (and double-dutched during recess), and everything was sparkly and smelled like frosting and sour watermelon. Sweet, sweet sour watermelon. It was truly a great time to be alive and has definitely made me the nostalgic adult I am today. But don’t even get me started on all the goodies I wanted to carry around in my keychain-covered Jansport backpack. From scented gel pens in every color to intoxicating body sprays, edible lipgloss, and body glitter galore, the turn of the millennium was downright delicious.

But the more I think about it, while many items I cherished during my childhood smelled like candy and cakes and cookies, they weren’t edible in the least… but I don’t think we cared. I mean, it’s not our fault — they smelled way too good to resist!

Even if we ingested some slightly toxic materials, the late ’90s were a blast!

Heck, even the early ’00s were a riot.

So, what is a little swallowed gum and poorly-marketed body products between friends?

Now, let’s reminisce and take a trip down scent-memory lane with the 21 most yummy-smelling things we definitely considered eating when we were small.

1. L’Oreal Kids Fish Shampoo

Flashback Friday to @Loreal Kids shampoo...... you know you used this stuff. Don't even pretend you didn't. #FBF pic.twitter.com/gARLmGmpxb

— FOXADHD (@FOXADHD) November 28, 2014

This shampoo was the bane of every child’s existence in the nineties. If you cannot relate, do not @ me.

The smell is tropical smoothie heaven in a fish-shaped bottle. Bath time spurs instant happiness, as well as confusion. Do I eat this, or…? Nope. Okay. That’s soap.

Scents included watermelon, strawberry, cherry almond, mango, and orange.

I can't afford anti-depressants so I just drink no more tears Loreal Kids shampoo.

— IanSharp__ (@Ian1sharp) December 28, 2017

And even pop star Arianna Grande admitted on her Twitter account that she still uses the shampoo! I guess we aren’t the only ones who think this soap smells like a combination of Starbursts, smoothies, and unicorn tears.

2. Herbal Essences Shampoo

Shoutout to Arianna Grande for keeping it real, but this was the shampoo you pretended to use when your friends came over for playdates and sleepovers. Herbal Essences smelled amazing, but you secretly still washed your hair with L’Oreal Kids.

3. Lip Smackers

Ah yes, Lip Smackers. We all hoarded secret collections of these little guys that totaled in the hundreds.

Me when I was 7 carrying my moms old purse with my lipsmackers and fake credit cards inside: pic.twitter.com/T0DcBbN7nR

— Katie Pollard (@vahsome) March 6, 2019

You had to have a favorite Lip Smackers or you couldn’t hang. Were you a Strawberry, Watermelon, Cotton Candy, or Dr. Pepper? The choices were endless and friendships would IMPLODE over disagreements about the best flavor.

Life could get pretty overwhelming, but in the end, all that really matters is that balm is life, and Cotton Candy is the best flavor (obviously).

4. Bath and Body Works Everything

You couldn’t go to the mall with your friends without stopping by Auntie Anne’s, Claires, and Bath and Body Works, of course. Where else were you going to stock up on Cucumber Melon or Warm Vanilla Sugar hand lotion and sweet smelling candles that melted away all your tweenaged angst?

An overwhelming delight for an adolescent whose main responsibility was to not forget to feed her Tamagatchi, all of Bath and Body Works’ products literally smelled liked a dessert buffet.

Did everyone in the nineties and early 2000s smell like cake?

The answer is yes. All cake, all the time. So fetch.

5.  Purple Grape-Scented Sunscreen

Banana Boat Cool Colorz Sunblock #reddit [via https://t.co/pyv0Tcqf8z] pic.twitter.com/KeTvH6wckX

— Sourced in Thailand (@sourcedinthai) May 2, 2018

Speaking of food-scented products, maybe it’s just me, but there is something a little disconcerting about a food-scented sunblock. I’m thinking a few kids mistook this sunscreen for a tasty treat.

And with a 30 SPF, you’ve got a mediocre sun protection that smells like a semi-nutritious fruit!

Don’t forget to reapply!

6. Bloonies

Bloonies pic.twitter.com/887fUAC0Ax

— Tatyana ☀️ (@Tatyana_Rose) August 16, 2017

Bloonies were ICONIC, but I still have some major THOUGHTS. What kind of brilliant idea is placing pungent rubber on a straw for kids to play with.

Are you kidding me? I’m appalled.

Bloonies, it had a certain smell to it #ScentsFromMyChildhood pic.twitter.com/0ipkKC15Fj

— Jessica Carberry (@Jessberrie) August 10, 2017

Bloonies had that alluring chemical smell that makes you figure you’re losing brain cells by the second with each sniff. You assumed it was non-toxic because it’s for kids and it’s on a straw. It took our breath away — literally.

7. Scratch and Sniff Stickers

We all loved these stickers that smelled like snacks! Somehow, getting them back on a spelling test was the highlight of the week, and we would sniff our papers for the rest of class.

Plus, psychoanalyzing the teacher’s sticker choices was fun, too.

“You didn’t get the apple riding a motorcycle? Tough break, Karen!” (Clearly, I was a delight.)

8. Dessert by Jessica Simpson

This line of dessert-themed makeup and body products by Jessica Simpson included powders, lipglosses, and sprays galore, and it was all edible! Millennial tweens went (sprinkles and) nuts for it. Thank you, Jessica Simpson, for letting me live out my dreams as a kid-sized, powdered donut. For this, I’ll never forget you.

While licking this stuff wasn’t toxic, it generally wasn’t recommended to eat the entire bottle.

9. Floam

FLOAM! 90s Night 2nite! RT @the90slife: Who remembers this stuff? http://t.co/VNc2Wcey

— Elysium (@ElysiumAustin) April 17, 2012

Before there were slime IG accounts, there was Floam.

It was sticky, it was gooey, and it had a distinct scent that got onto absolutely everything…

It was absolutely fantastic.

10. Fruit Stripe Gum

This multi colorful sensation was a delight to the eyes, nose, and taste buds. It even came with a little temporary zebra tattoo that made you feel soooooo rebellious. And the flavor! Mind-blowing!

That is, until about 10 seconds into chewing.

That’s when our illusions were shattered and we discovered gum was just a flavorless mass of rubber that we definitely should not eat.

11. Mr. Sketch Markers

The highlight of school was bringing out the Mr. Sketch marker case and getting to color, as your drawing transformed into a delectable, fruit salad-scented art piece.

I have to admit — all of these markers really smelled sensational.

Except for the black licorice marker. That marker smelled… like black licorice.

12. Barbie Bubblegum Mouthwash

It was pink, it was bubblegum, it encouraged dental hygiene, and it had Barbie on the bottle.

Honestly though, I think it was more about Barbie than it was about anything else.

…Do you guys know where I can still find this?

13. Victoria’s Secret Body Spray

Oh look, another candy-scented body spray from our youth.

This is definitely one for the history books to be noted as “the post-PE shower-replacement spray.”

The body mist smelled like strawberries and sparkles, but we all certainly did not. There is nothing that can mask the stench of running “the mile.”

14. Crayons

There was nothing like the smell of a box of freshly sharpened crayons. And when those crayons hit the paper? Perfection.

Was it just me, or did you really just want to eat a crayon?!

Hmm… Bath and Body Works should really consider a crayon-scented candle!

15. Bubble Gum-Flavored Medicine

Remember when you got sick and were prescribed liquid medication? It had a potent, super delicious, bubblegum smell, and lived up to the hype.

No medicine should be yummy enough to get you stoked about strep throat, but somehow…

I still wanted to gulp this stuff down.

 16. Scented Gel Pens

The highlight of a school day was taking out your pencil case and lining up all your new pencils, erasers, and gel pens. Scented jelly pens made your schoolwork delicious and fun!

Not to mention, obnoxiously colorful and difficult for your teachers to read. Sorry, Mrs. Stevens!

17. Smencils

Trading Smencils after the Scholastic Book Fair was the ONLY way to go. How else were you going to survive class without all the hot new flavors? Yeah, that ain’t happening.

18. Lancome Juicy Tubes

This lipgloss was poppin’. It smelled sweet as sugar and made you feel sophisticated and grown up, like when Lizzie McGuire goes to Rome and ditches Gordo for Paolo and Vespa rides.

Ugh. So mean, but so cool.

19. Bubblicious

The go-to grab at the grocery store. The strawberry smell emanated from the packaging, and I still dream about it to this day. Plus, the pieces were extra large and chewy, which meant more for you and fewer pieces for your friends to steal!

20. Hubba Bubba Bubble Tape

What is it with the nineties and bubble gum? This stuff was deliciously pink and potent, too — but in cute packaging. Also its tape form made it fun and easy to share and trade.

Major cool points at recess? Check.

21. Play-Doh

Don’t pretend you don’t know about Play-Doh. You’ve smelled Play-Doh, you’ve eaten Play-Doh, you may STILL want to eat Play-Doh.

You were a child, you’ve done this dance.