Kourtney Kardashian’s “Naughty” Birthday Cake Is Kinda Scary

Those of you who follow the Kardashian sisters on Instagram know that Kourtney’s 40th birthday party on Thursday, April 18th, was a bash and a half. As expected, the entire Kardashian-Jenner crew celebrated in style with friends, family, and a booty-licious birthday cake. Seriously guys, Kourtney’s “naughty” b-day cake was borderline disturbing and we need to talk about it.

Sister Kim gave fans a preview of the cake on her Instagram Stories. It’s an edible 3D version of Kourtney’s famous Poosh shot in which she’s naked, perched on the side of a bathtub. And it’s wildly spot-on.

Whoever made the cake did an excellent job of translating Kourtney’s curves to cake. The designer even included the bucket of champagne, Gucci heels, and pink satin robe crumpled on the floor. And thankfully, they also had the foresight to strategically place bubbles in specific areas in order to keep the cake as PG-13 as possible.

“Okay, Kourtney’s party is beginning, and this is the cake,” Kim said while filming a video for her Stories. Kourtney’s youngest interrupts his aunt as Kim panned upward: “No, do the butt!” Reign yelled in the background. “Take a picture of the butt!”

Honestly, Reign, the butt is hard to miss.

Thank goodness for those bubbles, huh? This cake was almost NSFW.

The cake may not suit everyone’s taste, and that’s totally understandable. We were on board until we caught a glimpse of Cake Kourtney’s face…

Sure, the angle might just be weird. But we have to be honest — that does not look like Kourtney.

Whoops. We’ll shut up now and let Twitter do the talking.

We’re not sure having an “alive-looking” birthday cake is all that great. It’s cake, after all. It’s meant to be eaten.

@kourtneykardash birthday cake looks so alive

— Aunty Bee (@Miss_Buhleigh) April 19, 2019

As for the rest of the party decor — it was totally on-point. Check out these cookies Kourtney was gifted by her kids:

The card that came with them read, “Let’s ‘face’ it, you are the sexiest 40-year-old ever! Happy Birthday! I love you, Mommy!” Too cute.

Kim also snapped a pic of these hilarious napkins. The quote is a call-back to when Kim dropped her diamond earring in the ocean and Kourt had this phenomenal comeback:

And remember when Kim called Kourtney “the least interesting [sister] to look at”? Yeah — that joke made an appearance at the party as well.

[fm_youtube url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urzF5LjN5kY"]

Except this time, Kourt was labelled the “MOST interesting to look at” on bottles of Don Julio 1942.

The guest list was stacked. Kourtney was serenaded by Robin Thicke and Sia, who sang “Happy Birthday” before everyone dove into that cake.

The whole crew was in attendance. When is this group dropping their next single?

Travis, Kanye, Quavo, French Montana & more at Kourtney Kardashian’s birthday party last night pic.twitter.com/3yNKFZL84O

— Drifter ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ rodeOTHealBum (@AGGRODR1FT) April 19, 2019

And this Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton reunion happened. Oh, how the tables have turned.

At least vintage Big Bird wasn’t there. That would have really put a damper on things.

Happy birthday to Kourtney Kardashian! If it’s any consolation, Kourt — you look way better than the cake.