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Waiters Who Shared Their Most Ridiculous “Rich Person” Experiences

Max Rosenberg

Published June 20, 2019

Being a waiter is tough. The long hours on your feet and the fast-paced nature of the job make it physically and mentally exhausting. On top of it all, waiters may have to deal with ridiculous customer requests. Having to maintain a cheerful disposition can take an emotional toll on servers. In fact, studies show that those in the service industry drink more at home. Their reliance on alcohol could be connected to the fact that they’re sometimes expected to hide their feelings and frustrations during the day.

Moreover, people who work in expensive restaurants and hotels typically encounter wealthy clientele. They may be tipped well for the most part, but those rich person interactions can be trying. Servers may get lavish gifts, but some richies refuse to tip or request special tables for their dogs. They may even order caviar to-go just for their fancy felines, while the rest of the world’s cats dine on Purina. It’s hard to resist drawing a human comparison.

Just like us normies, rich people have drastically different personalities. Some dangle money over waiters’ heads, and others leave tips big enough to pay off a good chunk of your credit card debt. You simply never know what you’re going to get from the one percent.

1. We Expected Better, Tim Allen

C’mon, Tim Allen! All those years of Home Improvement left you with enough money to leave a tip.

Not only did Tim Allen’s popular show Home Improvement run for eight seasons, but it’s also syndicated. That means Allen was even earning money while simply sitting in that bakery. If you look bad in comparison to Mario Batali, who faced sexual assault allegations for groping multiple women, it’s time to rethink your actions.

2. He Thought He Offended Brad By A Used Heuer Watch

We’re guessing this rich guy would be horrified by the concept of a thrift store.

Just for reference, a TAG Heuer watch is worth over $1,500. Let it sink in! There’s a good chance this watch costs more than your monthly rent. If the rich customer straight up gave Brad the money, he could have put a down payment on a car. But then again maybe Brad would have just bought a TAG Heuer watch with that cash — it’s hard to know.

3. Don’t Call Me By My Name

Okay, but wouldn’t you want to be the person standing next to the employee she’s yelling at?

Obviously, though, you owe your fellow waiter at least half of that hundred since you benefitted from their scolding. In all fairness, it sounds like Richladypants and her husband, Mr. Richladypants, may not have the happiest marriage if he’s spending all his free time at the casino. Go talk to him, Mrs. Pants. Make your needs heard!

4. Dogs Who Dine

The best part of being a billionaire is likely the privilege of bringing your dogs absolutely anywhere, no questions asked.

Health violations, smealth violations. When you have a giant wad of cash in your pocket, you can have as many dogs and women sitting at your table as you please. We have to wonder though: would the dogs still enjoy that foie gras if they knew where it came from? The answer is likely yes.

5. Just The Act Of Sending It Back Makes The Bread Divine

We all aspire to have a reserved wheel of cheese at our favorite restaurant.

Much like a high school freshman who learned about brie in their French 1 class, this rich lady thinks it’s the fanciest cheese. And who can blame her! Brie is good on everything. It’s melty and gooey and delicious. It pairs perfectly with gluten-free bread and sitting across the table from your dog —particularly if that dog is, much like an aunt on a diet, enjoying a lightly seasoned grilled chicken breast.

6. We Don’t Think That’s How You Make Coq Au Vin

Would you like some chicken with that pot of boiling wine?

Okay, this recipe sounds disgusting. But maybe it’s actually efficient — you get your dinner and your drinks all in one. There’s a belief that rich people are “better” because they have good time management skills, i.e. paying other people to do the chores most of us have to do ourselves. But maybe it’s really because they eat bowls of chicken wine soup. C’est la vie.

7. Whiskers Gets Only The Finest

This cat eats better than the majority of the Earth’s population.

When most of us splurge on our cats, we give them a small piece of fish or maybe even a new catnip toy. Every crazy cat lady or cat fellow likes to do it every once in a while. That’s simply a fact. Feeding caviar to your cat, however, takes spoiling them to a completely different level. But at least this fancy feline isn’t alone.

8. If You Live In Sweden, A Rich Teen Might Make You Pour Champagne Down The Sink

Our hearts go out to those bottles of champagne.

Stockholm’s rich kids: hear us out. Instead of pouring champagne down the sink, package the bottles nicely and send them to us. It would be an awesome prank! All your friends will think you’re cool. They’d say, “That dude? He sends bottles of fancy champagne to strangers. Isn’t he wild!” They may even high-five you.

9. This Woman Feeds Her Baby With A Literal Silver Spoon

If this happened in a movie, it’d be a heavy-handed metaphor.

If you can get past the silver spoon, there are other questions to be answered: do wealthy people still pretend the silver spoon is a plane? Or do they say, “Beep beep! The Porsche is coming through,” as they plunge a spoonful of organic mashed carrots into little Henry’s mouth? Alas, the lives of the rich remain a mystery.

10. I’ll Have A Soda With A Side Of Gaslighting

Rich people love to play soda roulette.

And who doesn’t love a fun game of chance? Just think, if you have money, it’s raining cola, baby! You can be a monster to the wait staff and kind of get away with it too. Not even your friends will keep you in check. However, if this woman is gaslighting a waiter over soda, imagine what her personal life is like.

11. Minestrone In Her Louis Vuitton, Say It Ain’t So

This woman proves that having a Louis Vuitton is actually hard.

Few of us consider having a Louis Vuitton bag a struggle, but it comes with its own set of hardships. For instance, you could spill soup in it. If you spill soup in a $12 tote bag, you can wash it (or pay someone to wash it, even!). Tote bags: 1, Louis Vuitton bags: 0.

12. A $0 Tip On A $350 Bill Just Hurts

Also, doing something about the state’s native fauna seems way above this waitress’s pay grade.

If there’s a special place in hell for people who are rude to waiters, this group will most likely be there. And who knows, they might even enjoy themselves. In fact, if life were like Greek mythology, those obnoxious customers would be forced to spend all of eternity swatting away mosquitoes on the river Styx (which isn’t home to lobster, as far as we know).

13. She Needed Servants’ Quarters

Even hotel servers aren’t spared.

This customer was obviously a relic of some past era. She thought her driver was a servant and acted as if the hotel waiters needed to bow and scrape to her. We don’t mind when people live in the past. Hey, it’s fun sometimes. Just don’t force everyone else to join you in your outdated bigotry. Thanks!

14. Servers Are Supposed To Find Your Sunscreen

And no rich customer should have to ask twice.

Seriously, we hardly believe this customer’s nerve. If she wanted a server to go on a hunt and retrieve mission she at least could have added some excitement to her voice. The server in question wasn’t even part of the regular wait staff. Presumably, they had to stop making drinks just to help one snob.

15. Were They Even Really Rich?

Or did they just want clout?

Customers like these are some of the worst. They have all of the delusions of some other wealthy clientele but none of the money (for tipping purposes) and none of the fame. You can’t even tell your friends that some celeb snob visited your place of employment. All those waiters had to show for that experience were hurt feelings. We like our hurt feelings with a side of money, please.