IHOP has seriously copped an attitude. After receiving massive blowback at the end of 2018 pertaining to their name change from IHOP to “IHOb,” done to inform the masses about their new burgers, the International House of Pancakes is officially changing their name back to IHOP. Except, the “P” doesn’t actually stand for “Pancakes” anymore. Well, it does… but it also doesn’t. Let us attempt to explain.
When IHOP announced last week via Twitter that they would be assigning a new meaning to the “P” in their acronym, everyone began sharing their two cents. It’s going to be “International Home of Pie,” one person chimed in. Another offered up the idea for “P” to mean “Pizza.” And some of us were like, “Oh, it’s definitely for Pride, right?” No, definitely not. According to Eater, IHOP’s parent company DineEquity is ultra-conservative and has donated money to Republican politicians and political action committees. So, no — “P” certainly isn’t going to mean “Pride.” Yikes.
And IHOP itself wasn’t giving us any clues. The chain even ran a Twitter poll that asked followers what they think the “P” should stand for, and the only options IHOP gave was “Pancakes.” And, yeah — it turns out that Pancakes won with 38% of the votes. Huh.
What could the P be?
— IHOP (@IHOP) June 1, 2019
Today, June 3rd, we finally found out what the new “P” stands for. It stands for “Pancakes,” but not the kind of pancakes we’re used to.
.@TheRexlChxndler wanted us to stick to pancakes. Well, this one's for you, Chandler… pic.twitter.com/ALanNzGAJM
— IHOP (@IHOP) June 3, 2019
Yup. Pancakes are now burgers. Don’t shoot the messenger.
We, as an entire nation of people, are now at war with the International House of “Pancakes,” if that’s even their real name.
Who can we blame? The marketing team? Chandler?
I tweeted mean things about @IHOP and @IHOb last year. And now I’m in their new ad with their new 100% USDA Choice Pancakes. And because they didn’t trust me to write this myself, they wrote it for me #ad https://t.co/PwaVipxsqq
— Chandler 💫 (@chandlerforsure) June 3, 2019
We’re angry. We’re confused. And quite honestly, we’re seeking revenge.
What's next? @WaffleHouse selling burgers and calling them Waffles?@wienerschnitzel selling burgers and calling them Hot Dogs?@Wendys letting their ice cream machines stay broken and calling themselves McDonald's?
— 𝘿𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙒𝙞𝙣𝙠𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝕏 (@thegiftofmayhem) June 3, 2019
It looks like we’re not the only ones, either. IHOP reportedly “rounded up people who criticized the IHOb campaign last year and added them to a ‘Bancake’ list.” Those on the list will need to tweet something positive about the burgers in order to be removed from the list, and they will possibly be given a reward, Business Insider reports.
Dear @IHOP please stick to what you do best making pancakes when I want a burger I will go get one at a burger place thank you! Sincerely,$ha
— $ha 🦂 (@Shatherealest) July 7, 2018
Yes. That sounds messed up to us, too.
IHOP president Darren Rebelez also told Business Insider that one of the new burgers IHOP is rolling out actually has a pancake sandwiched in the middle. It’s called the Big IHOP (the chain’s version of a Big Mac). And sadly, it doesn’t have pancakes instead of buns.
You had an opportunity to make burgers with PANCAKES FOR BUNS, and yet we're left a little disappointed again...
— Joe (@MobyDew) June 3, 2019
It’s just a hamburger with a pancake in it. Okay…
Hi Pancake, we're introducing The Big IHOP. It’s a pancake with a pancake in it! So now you can pancake with a pancake to your heart's content. Check it out for details: https://t.co/HnZfBBa25Q pic.twitter.com/7g9kfFzljk
— IHOP (@IHOP) June 3, 2019
The name plus the Big IHOP is making people lose their damn minds. It’s all too much for our senses.
How can we go back in time and stop this marketing faux pas before it happened? How? HOW?
I don't want to live on this planet anymore https://t.co/iy4C641pjq
— Jack Pandol (@jackpandol) June 3, 2019
This was supposed to be us before the reveal? This is us after the reveal, IHOP. Now and forever!
Wipe away those pancake tears. Just one day left before our big reveal. pic.twitter.com/DaNIYSsx3u
— IHOP (@IHOP) June 2, 2019
We think Grace said it best when IHOP first announced they were changing their name again. We can only imagine what Grace is thinking now.
P is for patience as we're almost all out of it.
— Grace Giulini (@gagc1) May 28, 2019
So…We’re sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Truly, we are.
We’re not sure how one exactly orders a pancake from IHOP now — like a real pancake. The waitstaffs in chains all over America must be sobbing real tears.
IHOP, it’s not too late to say “just kidding!” It’s really not. Think long and hard about this. Please.