At this point, it takes a lot for Starbucks to surprise me. It seems like every week, the coffee chain releases a new Frappuccino with a flavor I could have never dreamed up. This summer alone, we’ve already seen the Serious Strawberry Frappuccino and the Tea-ramisu Frappuccino — which are two pretty tame flavors, considering some of the bizarre drinks they’ve released in the past. (Remember the Unicorn Frappuccino?)
But there’s one weird Frappuccino that I still can’t get out of my head. It’s so strange, I still can’t believe that it was ever made, or that it continues to come back year after year. I’m talking about the Frappula Crème Frappuccino, a limited-edition drink that hits menus every October. What makes it so weird? It looks like it got bit by a vampire. Yes, really.
The Starbucks website calls the Frappula Crème Frappuccino “a drink so good, it’s scary.” No. No! I’m sorry, but no. I draw the line at coffee drinks meant to look like they’re bleeding. Because I. Do. Not. Vant. To. Think. About. Blood. When. I. Drink. Coffee. Period.
In fairness, the flavors DO sound yummy. The Frappula Crème Frappuccino is a white chocolate mocha crème Frappuccino with mocha sauce, strawberry purée, and whipped cream. But why couldn’t they just call it the Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Frappuccino and offer it around Valentine’s Day? There’s a free idea, Starbucks. You can have that one.
Behold the weirdest Frappuccino Starbucks has ever released: the Frappula Crème Frappuccino.
A Frappuccino that sleeps in a coffin?
NOBODY ASKED FOR THIS.
And if I may, I’d like to give an honorable mention to the Zombie Frappuccino.
It’s also highly unnecessary.
If you MUST celebrate Halloween at Starbucks, I recommend avoiding drinks altogether and ordering a Mummy Cake Pop instead.
It’s on the correct side of adorable.
I will drink 10 venti Unicorn Frappuccinos in one sitting if it means I never have to drink a Frappula Crème Frappuccino. (Please don’t hold me to that.) Will the Frappula make its return this October? Only time vill tell.
Did you know that Starbucks has a rewards program? By joining Starbucks Rewards, you can get free food and drinks (and even free refills!). You can even order and pay for your favorites on your phone. Cheers!
