On a rare cold day in Los Angeles, the mood was ominous. It became increasingly so when we learned that Chuck E. Cheese may be stitching together their pizza using half-eaten pies. Rats! (Pun fully intended.)
This theory of betrayal comes from YouTuber Shane Dawson, who took on Chuck E. during a video entitled “Investigating Theories with Shane Dawson” (which now has over 15 million views). In it, he states, “There’s a theory that if somebody at Chuck E. Cheese doesn’t finish their whole pizza…the employee will take that to the back, take those pieces off the tray, and form a new pizza with all the other leftovers. And then reheat it and serve it to a new customer.”
Shane first noticed that something was off with the establishment’s pizza as a kid — when he ordered half pepperoni, half cheese, the two halves looked like they were pasted together — and has had this theory ever since.
Though we have no idea if this is actually true, the photos leave us with some questions.
Why are all the slices different sizes?
Why do the crusts not fit together?
Why don’t the pieces of pepperoni match up?
What is Chuck E. hiding from us? And is Chuck E. hiding something from us in his pizza?
Shane goes on to say that, when he was in high school, he asked a former Chuck E. Cheese employee if his theory is true. They responded saying that “it was a thing,” and that “[the company] stopped it.” WHAT.
[fm_youtube url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNuKpwX6Tz4"]Also, Shane isn’t the only one with this theory. On a 2009 Yahoo! Answers thread asking if Chuck E. Cheese recycles their pizza, an anonymous user said, “Pizza that is not eaten (so I’ve heard) goes back into a dough grinder and eventually gets reserved as part of a new pizza. It’s re-cooked so you don’t need to worry about germs.”
Another simply, and comically, answered, “Tastes like it.”
To get to the bottom of it, we ordered a medium Chuck E. Cheese pizza from Postmates, sent to our office. And what we received is this:
This is what the pizza looked like as soon as we opened up the box. We did our best not to jostle it around, and the nearest Chuck E. Cheese establishment is only a few blocks away from the office. In short: It really shouldn’t look all detached like that.
“The whole thing is bizarre and confusing,” says editor in chief Gina Vaynshteyn. “Some parts of the pizza arrived cleanly cut off, like the Chuck E. Cheese employee used a machete only on certain slices, but left the rest alone. Like, I can see why people are saying they are taking old slices and shoving them into fresh pizzas. The crusts don’t quite match, and why are only SOME slices glued together with cheese? It’s weird.
Then again, taking old slices of pizza and recycling them seems like a lot of work, and not super cost-efficient, when you think about how much time the employees spend hacking a pizza and making sure it doesn’t look gross instead of just making it from scratch (let’s be real, they probs have premade dough ready to go). Plus, would Chuck E. Cheese risk spreading illness when kids are KNOWN to be walking blobs of bacteria? That would have been all over the dot com already. My verdict? I think something is going on, but I don’t think Chuck E. Cheese is recycling pizzas. Maybe they have robot pizza slicer. Shrug.”
Gina’s overall rating: 6/10.
Social media manager Sade Akenzua stated, “The sizing of the overall pizza looked a little off. The slices didn’t line up next to each other. Like, one slice clearly looked like it came from a different pizza. Not sure how that happened, but the slices definitely weren’t the same,” adding that the medium-sized pizza looked way smaller than she remembered.
“Now, the taste completely brought me back to my childhood!” Sade continued. “The cheese was extra chewy, but like in a good Chuck E. Cheese way, and the crust was also pretty good!”
“Overall, 7/10 — gave a couple of extra points for the nostalgia!”
On the other hand, editorial assistant Bailey Cox wasn’t able to finish her “rubbery” slice, explaining, “I felt like I needed to really inspect each slice before choosing mine, ever since I saw that some slices looked like they didn’t belong with the whole pizza.”
The nostalgia simply wasn’t enough and Bailey’s rating ended up being “3/10, would not have again.”
Brand design editor Anna Buckley brought up a good point, stating that her adult palette is likely influencing her 4/10 rating: “The pizza was fine. Maybe it’s because I’ve consumed far better pizza in the 15 or so years since I last had Chuck E. Cheese pizza, but I remember it being better back then. Then again, I did have the rose-colored palette of a kid surrounded by games and prizes. The cheese tasted rubbery and thick just like it used to, but the crust is definitely different now. Not better or worse, just different.”
“Would I order Chuck E. Cheese pizza nowadays when I have far better options? Nah.”
As for myself, I’m the annoying Angeleno who preaches the good word of New York pizza — because really, nothing can compare to the pizza of my home state. Especially Chuck E. Cheese. Not even close. Though I ate my entire slice, I’d give this pie a 2/10 because 1) my stomach is currently angry with me, 2) it’s only good in a bad pizza kind of way, and 3) it really does look like a Frankenstein pie.
Unlike with a normal pizza, the cheese spilled over the sides of some of the slices. It’s almost as if the pizza wasn’t one whole piece when it was cooked (or reheated), which would explain why there was spillage instead of a fully-connected layer of cheese. If you were to pull out a slice near where it looks like two different pies were pushed together, the cheese would pull away from the box instead of the rest of the pie.
Here’s a photo of a normal pizza, courtesy of iStock:
iStock
Of course, this could be because the pizza was tossed around while it was prepared, cooked, or transported. It could be because it was pre-cut (which is weird, but okay) or because it was sliced the moment it came out of the oven. Maybe it’s even the dough recipe!
There are certainly other possibilities.
In the face of our mere opinions and theories, a spokesperson for Chuck E. Cheese has this to say, according to People: “The claims made in this video about Chuck E. Cheese’s and our pizza are unequivocally false. No conspiracies here — our pizzas are made to order and we prepare our dough fresh in restaurant, which means that they’re not always perfectly uniform in shape, but always delicious.”
There you have it — straight from the rat’s mouth.
Pizza conspiracy theories aside, we did appreciate the party plates we received along with our pie. So at least Chuck E. has that going for him.
