As you probably know, the amount you tip often has a lot to do with the amount you spend. Sure, you might want to tack on a few extra bucks if you had exceptional service, but as an industry standard, anywhere between 15 and 20% of the bill total is considered average. (Or at least, not disrespectful.)
That said, it makes sense that your waiter would want that bill to be as high as it can be, especially since it’s not like they’re the ones making the food.
Obviously, a good waiter has never sat you down and forced you to order a tiramisu. But a good waiter has used subtle hints and body language to make that upsell. On Quora, a question was asked about the tricks that waiters use that customers never catch onto, and literally, none of the responses are things you’d expect.
Even if you think you’re privy to these waiter tricks, be sure to read through and see if you spot these upsell tactics next time you dine out.
1. The “Slice Missing” Trick
Took tables today!! My first table was a table of 7 I was super nervous. But I got everything right and even upsold dessert: )
— paymeinprofit (@RickkyMAC) September 3, 2013
Lancaster also mentioned a trick involving cake.
You know those beautiful rotating dessert trays at some diners and restaurants? There is a reason most of them are not full or uncut pies or cakes.
Supposedly if it’s on display with a slice taken out, people might immediately assume it’s good.
After all, someone else ordered it. It’ll also let them know that other diners have no issue adding a course onto their meal.
2. Adding Two Straws To A Drink
It looks decorative, but it’s actually a trick to get you to finish your drink twice as fast.
If it’s alcoholic, you’ll definitely want another one (or two) before dinner arrives. Also, you might not recognize the effects all that quickly based on the fact that you’re drinking them so fast. Come on, who hasn’t accidentally had a drink (or three) more than they intended during a night out?
By the time the tip comes, you may be a little tipsy and overgenerous.
3. Forecasting Good Weather
Talking about sunny skies can put customers in a brighter mood.
According to Michael Lynn of the Center for Hospitality Research, forecasting good weather puts people in a good mood. And naturally, people in a good mood are more likely to tip higher than folks in a bad mood.
Of course, if you are a server and you know the next day is going to be a rainy one, lying likely won’t improve your tip.
4. Telling The Table They’re New
Telling customers you're new when you mess up #justfedsthings
— FEDS FAM (@FedsFam) February 22, 2016
This one actually comes from Reddit.
One waitress’s boss told her to tell her tables that she was “new” for years because people often take pity and tip high.
And if she happens to be “new” and also be amazing at the job? Even better. The one downfall for a waiter using this tactic is to make sure they don’t say they’re “new” to a group they waited on two years prior. That’ll lower tips for sure.
5. Paying Attention To The Kids
Great experience at @calpizzakitchen Valley Fair. The kids loved the waiter. She was great!
— AKG (@paintedcow) May 6, 2013
If you have kids, your waiter might also pay extra close attention to them.
This is for two reasons. One, the parents will appreciate the fact that the kids seem welcome at the restaurant, which may increase the tip.
Two, they likely won’t hesitate to bring their kids back and order more food at a later time. When you’re a parent, finding a place you love that doesn’t mind serving children is golden.
6. Complimenting Your Order Choice
It’s probably not “totally their favorite” dish.
The Center for Hospitality Research also suggests that complimenting the customer will earn the waiter a higher tip. And given the psychology of compliments, it makes sense.
“To the brain, receiving a compliment is as much a social reward as being rewarded money,” Professor Norihiro Sadato told Forbes. So when your brain gets that rush of dopamine after your waiter tells you your order is one of his favorites, you are more likely to tip higher.
7. Lightly Touching Your Arm
THE CUTE WAITER TOUCHED MY SHOULDER EXCUSE ME AS I FANGIRL 😍☺️
— alissa 🦉 (@AlissaReyYAY) March 27, 2016
You’d imagine that the waiter would have to get a pretty good read on the individual beforehand, since not everyone is into physical touch.
Even though waiters shouldn’t be making other people uncomfortable — and it’s important that they brush up on social etiquette in other countries, if they’re planning on working overseas. Generally, though, this technique works, according to Ray Lancaster, who identifies as an influence and communication specialist/trainer.
Some may also feel like a light bit of flirting may equal a bigger tip.
Again, it’s a little creepy to actually use as a tactic, especially if you have a hard time reading people. But if that babely waiter is touching your shoulder or laughing way too hard at your jokes, they may be working for a nice tip.
And hey, we get it, given that many servers depend on tips to make a living.
But here’s the problem.
Some waiters take it way too far, especially with women. Customers come to a restaurant to eat, not for the opportunity to wonder if they’re going to be followed home by the awkward waiter after lunch.
Think it was supposed to be whimsical and French but guess fucking what, it was creepy and uncomfortable and symptomatic of a culture at large where women’s bodies and comfort are an afterthought if they are considered at all
— Iris Goldsztajn (@irisgoldsztajn) November 16, 2018
That’s why even if this tactic works, it should probably be ditched. It’s 2019, and not everyone sees a shoulder touch as a casual, friendly interaction.
And since this was a top tip, it happens more often than you might think.
But luckily, there are others that are less creepy.
8. Parroting
Lancaster also wrote that parroting the order back often worked, probably because it makes customers feel as if their waiter is attentive and that their order will be correct.
It’s way better than the waiter who nods and writes down nothing. It’s like a guarantee you’ll get chicken, instead of the beef that you ordered.
Also, it’s a great active listening technique in general.
9. Secretly Upselling Extra Dips And Sides
First curry on Brick Lane. Waiter upsold me to the chef's special version of a Pathia without mentioning it was double the price #conned
— Treasured Travels 🌍 (@BeckySkel) February 24, 2015
A good (yet kind of suspicious) way to upsell the whole order is to tell them about extra cheese or sour cream on the side as an option, without mentioning the cost.
It’s deceiving, yet hard to fight when the bill comes. It’s kind of like places that don’t offer free refills on the soda… which you realize after ordering three rounds of Diet Pepsi.
Still, we still feel like waiters should mention the costs. No one is going to turn down extra cheese or guacamole for just a buck or two more. Trust us.
10. Pushing Dessert At The End Of A Meal
But, one of the biggest indulgences when eating out? Dessert.
Usually, people decide not to opt-in, unless it’s a special occasion or it comes with their dinner.
But, all it takes is for the waiter to grace you with a dessert menu. It’s hard not to stare, especially with those yummy-looking photos lovingly staring back at you. We’re not even mad at this one, to be honest.
11. Squatting Down At The Table
There’s a reason so many waiters pull this weird move.
According to Michael Lynn of the Center for Hospitality Research, squatting next to a table isn’t something waiters do just because they’ve been on their feet all day. Lynn says that squatting down next to the customers allows the waiter or waitress to be on the same eye level and make a positive connection.
Although Lynn notes this doesn’t always work. Servers need to be able to read their customers’ body language to see how much personal space they need.
12. Upselling The Booze
When she said “I got you Tito’s instead Bc I know you don’t like house vodka” I felt that
— pocket papi (@nowueyjose) January 7, 2018
One of the biggest upsells on the bill happens with alcohol.
If a waiter is taking drink orders, they might suggest a high-shelf vodka instead of their house vodka.
While you’re in the moment, it’s hard to say no. Especially when they don’t tell you how much extra the Grey Goose will be.
13. Flooding Them With Candy
I distinctly remember the moment when I realized that the “after dinner mint” I was eating secretly had chocolate inside. I was a kid, so I couldn’t raise a tip based on this discovery. But, I felt special.
Just imagine if that same waiter gives more after-dinner candy than necessary. It happens sometimes and makes the customer feel like they struck gold. The same goes for fortune cookies and other post-dinner treats.
14. Walking A Crazy-Expensive Drink Around A Restaurant
Don’t quote me on this, but I’ve heard that Red Robin also does this with onion rings.
Even if it’s not intentional, it works. (Because the only time I’m dying for onion rings is when the next table over has a bunch.)
Sometimes, all it takes to strike a craving is to see something paraded around the restaurant. If it’s a fancy and expensive drink, you’d probably say, “I want one of those” before “How much does that cost?”
15. They’ll Try To Personalize The Receipt
This one also comes from Reddit, but it’s something you’ve likely seen plenty of times before.
By adding a smiley face to the receipt, your waiter or waitress comes off as being quite friendly.
And sometimes, that’s enough. The customer might not realize they’re writing that on everyone’s check — they just like to feel special, and will tip accordingly.
16. They’ll Wear Jewelry That Looks Like Food
A Quora suggestion stated that sometimes, you need to dress the part.
And that means wearing jewelry shaped like food. It’s almost like the flair in Office Space, I guess.
A waiter named Alison Bourke wore swirly earrings that resembled spaghetti and realized that her pasta sales had increased.
17. Opening The Menu To An Expensive Page
If you’re seating customers and introducing them to the menu, casually opening it to an expensive page may work wonders.
It’s a small maneuver you may not even realize, but your eyes are sure to check out that page first. And when you spot filet mignon or surf ‘n turf, it’s a little hard to order the Caesar salad.
18. Reminding The Customers That They’re Human
It’s easy to take pity on people who seem real to you.
So, sometimes a waiter or waitress might fumble or embarrassingly react to their own cheesy joke just to show you they’re human.
It also adds another layer to their personality. This isn’t just a waitress you’re dealing with — it’s a girl named Katie who’s on her final year of her master’s degree, and she’s been up all night writing a paper. Suddenly, she’s relatable.
19. Suggesting Gratuity
Sometimes customers can get cheap without even knowing it.
There is a reason why parties of six or more often have additional gratuity tacked on: groups tend to tip less thanks to the shared bill effect.
“When you add up the money there’s never quite enough and so part of the tip is swallowed up to make up for the shortfall,” Claudia Hammond wrote for the BBC. This is why at the bottom of checks restaurants will have tips calculated for you. They don’t want their servers getting stiffed!
