Back in the day, we all knew that fast food wasn’t good for us. But we were blissfully unaware of what that actually meant. Calories were usually not very straightforward, and most restaurants weren’t forced to put their menu’s nutritional information out in the open like they are today. These days, we have better control over what we eat. Well, sort of.
The thing is, even if we really want to eat healthier, it’s really hard to avoid some of the brand new products that McDonald’s, Burger King, and Taco Bell are shelling out. We tell ourselves that eating a burger just once won’t do a lot of harm. And it won’t — but when that burger becomes an absolute favorite, sometimes we’ll end up splurging on more than one occasion.
Sadly, I’m here to bring the harsh truth that sometimes the food that takes you literally ten seconds to devour can carry about a day’s worth of calories.
But the biggest shock is when an item that appears healthy — or seems to be a healthier choice — contains way more calories than you assumed. Even if something is a salad, sometimes the calories in the dressing and toppings are killer.
Here are a few of the most surprisingly caloric menu items you can get.
1. Taco Bell Breakfast Crunchwrap
Let me go on record and say that the Taco Bell Breakfast Crunchwrap is literally the best fast food breakfast item you can get. From anywhere. Both the sausage and bacon varieties are the definition of excellence. That said, it’s also surprisingly caloric. Even though I wish I could eat one of these every morning, my body would be pretty upset with me.
Total calories: 660
2. McDonald’s Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese
Here’s a weird fact. You’d assume that the Double Quarter Pounder wouldn’t be all that different from a regular Quarter Pounder in terms of nutrition. It’s probably just one additional patty, right? But that upgrade will actually cost you 240 calories. A regular Quarter Pounder with cheese, for comparison, contains 540 calories.
Total calories: 780
3. Popeye’s Catfish Po’Boy Sandwich
over at popeye's right now and this catfish po boy means everything to me in this instance
— Mr. Rogers (@terronosaurus) March 31, 2014
You might think that fish would be the healthier choice at Popeye’s, but this sandwich will take up pretty much all of your daily calories. It’s 800 calories, and in case you’re curious, 25 Weight Watchers points. Yikes. The seafood po’boy contains either shrimp or fish on a French baguette with pickles, tartar sauce, and lettuce.
Total calories: 800
4. Burger King’s Eggnormous Burrito
Breakfast burritos are everything, but spending 930 calories right at the start of your day is a mistake. Unless you’ve got a pretty severe appetite, that is. At the very least, the burrito seems to live up to its name. Burger King says that it features “a generous serving of savory sausage, thick-cut smoked bacon, lots of fluffy eggs, shredded cheddar cheese, golden hash browns, plus a creamy spicy sauce all wrapped up in a warm flour tortilla and served with a side of Picante Sauce.”
Total calories: 930
5. Panera Bread’s Toasted Tuscan Grilled Chicken Sandwich
When you hear “grilled chicken,” you might assume this sandwich would make for a pretty healthy lunch. But at 910 calories, that’s unfortunately not the case. Panera Bread states that it contains provolone, parmesan, chicken that has been raised sans antibiotics, arugula, a smoky tomato confit, basil pesto, basil mayo, and an artisan ciabatta bread. It’s safe to say you’ll be full after eating this item.
Total calories: 910
6. Five Guys Large Fries
If you’ve ever been to Five Guys, you know they’re quite generous with the fries — which is why you might never have ordered a large to begin with. But if it’s your first time, or you’re just really hungry, know that it’ll probably be the worst fast food decision you make all week.
Total calories: 1,314
7. Arby’s Double Stack Reuben
Fans of corned beef might grab a limited time Double-Stack Reuben at Arby’s without realizing that the sandwich is nearing the 1,000 calorie mark. For some reason, this particular sandwich just doesn’t seem like it’d be one of their most caloric offerings. Arby’s even advises, “Just go to the counter and say, ‘I’d like the Double Stack Reuben please. Yes, the one with twice as much corned beef on it as the regular Reuben.'”
Total calories: 810
8. Large Chips and Queso at Chipotle
It seems crazy, but it’s true. The calorie count on a large chips and queso order at Chipotle puts it more in the “meal” category, instead of just a side. It’s a shame they’re so good (and so easy to eat). A copycat Chipotle quest recipe from Dinner Then Dessert includes tomatillo salsa, cheddar cheese, whole milk, lime juice, lemon juice and a ton of different spices. It is certainly a complex dish.
Total calories: 1,270
9. Olive Garden’s Lasagna Dip
You’d probably expect that a mess of cheese, meat, and mozzarella wouldn’t be low calorie. But, 950 for just an appetizer? Save room for those endless breadsticks. Olive Garden describes this dish as being “layers of cheese and homemade meat sauce, topped with smoked mozzarella and baked to perfection. Served with NEW house-made pasta chips tossed with parmesan and garlic salt.”
Total calories: 950
10. Burger King’s Chicken Club Salad
You may think you’re doing yourself a favor by ordering a chicken club salad, but don’t be deceived. You could get two cheeseburgers instead, and have a less caloric meal. Even a bacon double cheeseburger at Burger King is just 400 calories. The salad itself includes a mix of lettuce, shredded cheddar, thick-cut smoked bacon, tomatoes, and buttery garlic croutons.
Total calories: 610
11. Panera Bread’s Cuban Sandwich
As a safe bet, if you order a sandwich at Panera Bread, it probably has way more calories than you initially thought. Their Cuban sandwich was added to their 2018 fall menu and features ham, shredded pork, and Swiss cheese. Their standard ham and Swiss sandwich is marginally better for you, at 600 calories.
Total calories: 800
12. Wendy’s Spicy Avocado BLT Chicken Sandwich
Wait, this sandwich includes both avocado and chicken and it’s still worse for you than a Whopper from Burger King? That’s straight up baffling. “A juicy, lightly breaded chicken breast marinated and breaded in our unique, fiery blend of peppers and spices topped with Applewood smoked bacon, lettuce, tomato, muenster cheese, cool buttermilk ranch and creamy avocado. It’s the best thing to happen to the BLT since abbreviations,” states Wendy’s.
Total calories: 740
13. Red Robin’s Crispy Chicken Burger
Over 900 calories for a chicken sandwich? And that doesn’t even include the bottomless fries, which is a straight-up injustice. Red Robin’s description of the burger is actually pretty simple, saying that it contains pickles, onions, lettuce, tomatoes, and mayo — aside from the crispy chicken, of course. We appreciate their straightforwardness.
Total calories: 920
14. Tom and Chee’s Beef and Cheddar Grilled Cheese
OMG, The wonder of Tom+Chee's Beef and Cheddar pales next to their blue cheese chili. How do you top that?
— Typing Horse BLM every day! (@Greyflank) October 3, 2015
Grilled S'Mores Donut Sandwich!
When you run a small chain that literally serves grilled cheese, tomato soup, and donuts, there probably aren’t a lot of healthy choices on the menu. But this one, which seems to combine everything we all love about burgers and grilled cheese, is especially bad. Be careful with this one, guys.
Total calories: 960
15. McDonald’s Triple Breakfast Stack McGriddle
This is yet another “delicious, but way too much for the morning” meals. But still, we should all be thankful that McDonald’s introduced such a delicious fast food menu item into our lives. Good thing they do all-day breakfast now, right? According to Today, “Triple Stacks come, well, stacked on three bread options: a fluffy biscuit, a toasted McMuffin bun or a sweet McGriddle cake. Packed inside are two sausage patties, crispy bacon and an egg, plus, two slices of melted American cheese.”
Total calories: 850
16. Qdoba’s Habanero BBQ Brisket Quesadilla
It sounds delicious and is probably quite the meal. And if it’s the only meal you plan on eating all day, you’re good to go. Qdoba describes their grilled quesadillas as, “Lightly grilled. Cheese melted to perfection. Jam-packed with all the flavor you can handle.” Sounds delicious, which is apparently what makes this dish so dangerous. Eat with caution.
Total calories: 1,270
17. Red Robin’s Whiskey River BBQ Burger
This is one I’ve had plenty of times before — that is, until I looked it up online. This burger contains a special Whiskey River barbecue sauce, crispy onion straws, cheddar cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, and mayo. Thankfully, Red Robin has plenty of alternate menu items that are less caloric and still satisfying.
Total calories: 1,130
18. Burger King’s Big Fish
This is just another reminder that just because it’s fish, it doesn’t mean it’s healthy — especially if it comes from a fast food restaurant. This White Alaskan Pollock sandwich seems really yummy but is literally worse for your diet than a Whopper Jr. It is packed with White Alaskan Pollock breaded with panko, a sweet tarter sauce, tasty pickles, and a brioche bun.
Total calories: 510
At the end of the day, this doesn’t mean you need to stop eating your fast food faves — but eating food that’s super high in calories that doesn’t provide much nutritional value should be something you should probably do in moderation. Your health is your (and your doctor’s) business alone, so it’s up to you to make the right choices.
